2004-10-21 - 10:10 a.m.

First off:


Ok. Now that I got that out of my system and the world finally sees the Yankees as the baby eating threats to national security and heterosexuality that they really are, I can get back to business.

I had a stupid, punk-ass epiphany yesterday thanks to Stefanie. This is what I get for reading Joyce. Anyway, I look back over my life for the past few years and I see that I have never, ever shared all the aspects of my life with one person. I mean, I talk to Heather about my spiritual life and I talk to Stefanie about my struggles with depression and my feelings of isolation and I talk to Jen about my struggles with writing and dating and just about everything else. And then there is you guys - to you I talk about donkey punches and dirty sanchezes. Aren't you lucky!

Now this may not seem to be a problem, but really it is. I mean, no wonder I feel so lonely when I am never a whole person or present myself as a whole person to anyone at all. Who really knows me? Well, each of my best friends knows about one third of me. And I owe each of them an apology for that. And if one of you is reading this, I will give you a personal apology. And don't tell me that I have nothing to apologize for because even if you don't see it or don't care, I see it and I care. So fuck off and accept my apology graciously or I'll have to get rough with yas.

I hate you James Joyce and your stupid infatuation with epiphanies! Of course, Araby was a great story... and The Dead... Oh, well, James Joyce, I can't stay angry at you! Not with your cute widdle gwasses and you siwwie widdle facial hair!

Anyway, I guess I was being "weird" the other day. I think it was that silly blood and body of Jesus thing.

I hate "hidden" tracks on CDs. I made this great CD for Stefanie last night and I was so excited, but I made the play list from memory and I forgot that the third track on the CD has about 6 minutes of absolute silence, so I have to re-think the whole thing and burn the CD again. I mean, this whole hidden track thing was clever back in, oh, I don't know, 1990, but now it is just trite and stupid. And if it is an attempt to stop people from burning mix CDs then it doesn't work, it just makes it annoying. I mean, I'll just not put that song on the CD. Maybe that was the song that would make Stefanie buy the album. Who knows? She'll never get to hear it. Or, I could cut out the dead silence with any number of freely available tools but I'm just too lazy. Plus I've been doing bong hits all morning and really should get back to programming. I'm working on an air traffic control system today.

Maybe it's a good thing I need to reburn the CD because I meant to put on a couple of tracks from The Decemberists and somehow forgot to do so.

And lastly:


Reading Infernal CIty just in case I ever end up visiting
Plotting to finish the story I started last night. Yeah, that's right! I'm writing again!
14 comments so far