2004-10-25 - 10:51 a.m.

Hello, everybody!

Hi, Dr. Nick!

Got some great entries for the contest but keep them coming. The deadline is November 20 something. I forget, so go take a look. Check back often, as that will artificially increase my page views and make me think I am loved. Yes, I try to cultivate illusions to maintain my sanity. Stefanie would say that this whole church thing is more of the same thing. Feh.

Went to Witch's Woods yesterday. It was fun, especially if you were a pedophile into 13 year-old girls. That seemed to be most of the crowed. And man, they scare easy! They scar easy, too, but that's a different story. It was actually quite fun, though, despite the large number of Jr. High kids there. I went with Jen and her fiance Eric and Eric's younger sister Leeann and Leeann's boy friend Brian. Leeann and Brian seem ok. Leeann didn't steal anything all night, which is quite an accomplishment for her, but she did make a lot of off color jokes which normally wouldn't bother me, but she seems a bit too young to be making these kinds of jokes. I must be getting old...

Kids these days, with their music and their clothes and there yippity yee haw. Feh. *Reaches for whicker cane to wave at young whipper snappers who TPed my house last Halloween*

But they are good kids. I suspect as much at least. Like all kids their age, they try and make it seem like they aren't good kids, but whatever. Young people suck.

Some of the attractions at the WW were fun, like the "3-D" maze. You walk around in 3-D glasses and the walls are covered with 3D stuff which is very disorienting in the dark. While waiting in line, Leeann initiated a group hug which I resisted as I think there are laws against someone my age hugging a seventeen year-old who isn't a blood relative and Leeann says "Why aren't you hugging? Where is the love?" to which I responded "Sorry. I haven't had enough alcohol to have any love." which is kind of true. Alcohol definitely helps me generate enthusiasm for such concepts as "love" and "goodness". Otherwise I just wallow in self-pity and evil dreams.

Speaking of evil dreams, as you may know, I work for one of these on-line dating sites. Recently, we were testing the system and I posted a test ad which was rejected by customer service. For your education and benefit, I will post this ad and ask "Why would they reject this?"

Now that I'm no longer under house arrest...
... I thought I would take a look around here and see what is going on. I still have to be in that stupid registry, so I can't move around too much, but if you live in the Boston area, are totally anti-social and sometimes think you might have an undiagnosed mental or developmental illness, let me know. I think we'll have a lot in common. In the meantime, watch out for gnomes. Those guys are tricky.

I have no idea why they didn't let that puppy run.

That's about it for today, kiddos! Keep those contest entries coming in. I'm desperate here! If you don't send me banners I will assume that none of you love me and then I will kill myself in a graphic way designed to start many urban legends (perhaps something involving my large collection of Disney-themed pornography?) and we wouldn't want that to happen, right?

Or maybe we would...

Well, I don't feel like thinking up some strange suicide scenario, so either send me a banner entry or tell me what exotic way you would like me to "off" myself.

Ta, ta!

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