2004-09-26 - 6:58 p.m.

Ok, ok, ok... Everyone just remain calm. The following news may be shocking. I think I might have made a new friend last night. Updates will follow.

Yesterday morning I wake up excited at the thought of a big, wonderful weekend spreading out before me. After my breakfast on cold cereal and The Believer my brother calls and says "Hey, I'm thinking of going to see Shaun of the Dead before I leave for Oregon" and I think - ok, this is exactly what I planned on doing anyway so, like a naive fool say "Sure, sounds good." He says he'll call later after he has packed a bit.

So, I wait. And I wait. And I think maybe I'll go run some errands since I have my cell phone with me it's not like I will miss his call. But I figure I don't want to have to carry all the sundries I need to buy to the movie theater. With this is mind I decide to put off my trip to CVS to Sunday and return to my pathetic pass time of waiting.

And waiting

And waiting

(Sense a pattern here?)

Around 8:30 or so, he calls and says "I just finished packing and I want to hit the road tonight, so I wont be going to the movie. By the way, do you have any cash?"

It's all so perfectly reasonable, right? But this happens a lot - him canceling plans at the last minute. So why should this time be any different? Rather this time is a kind of emblem of all the other times he's done this as I probably wont see him for months and I might need a reminder of where things stand.


So I figure I'll go see it today. Which I did and it was good. It wasn't as good as I thought it would be but I would definitely recommend it if you like British comedy or if you like zombie movies. I like both and I'm glad I saw it. Your mileage may vary.

Also, I woke up early (9:30 which for me is early for a Sunday) and went to church for the first time in months. I didn't go to the church I used to go to because I was worried I might see people I know and then I might have to talk with them and I just couldn't face that today.

So I went to this church because I've wanted to see what an Episcopalian church service is like and it is pretty close to my house.The service wasn't that long but it was nice and orderly which I liked. However, there was a lot of kneeling time and I felt like my legs were going to cramp up so I had to sit part of the service when we were suppose to be kneeling. I was extra embarrassed when I saw a whole bunch of rickety old people who were having no problem kneeling for the whole time. Ugh! Maybe I just wasn't using the little kneeling stool properly. These guys kneel more than Catholics.

The sermon was nice. They took one of my favorite passages and put a whole new slant on it for me. The theme of the sermon was about how we put barriers and gaps between ourselves and others, but especially how affluent people like me cut ourselves off from the poor.

What I didn't like about the church was how everyone was dressed up. All the guys had ties and all the women wore dresses or nice skirts. I felt a bit out of place in my jeans, but I need to wear jeans on the weekends as my work clothes need to last and I go through clothes very quickly for some reason. They just fall apart. They have an evening service, so maybe I'll try that next week and see if the people don't dress a little more casually. I know it's shallow, but I just can't relax when everyone is wearing a tie but me,

So, am I going to give this whole "church" thing another go? I don't know yet. I still feel... well, I don't know exactly. I can't seem to get my feelings straight. I was chatting last night on AIM and the person I was speaking with said "I don't think God believes in me" which is odd because I think I had used those very words to describe how I felt in an email I wrote to Heather.

Speaking of which, I got an email from Heather today. I don't totally understand it. She forwarded me a letter she wrote to a co-worker of hers who apparently had someone close to them die of cancer. She must think it is relevant to me but I just can't see it right now. I'll have to re-read it later because I suspect that I'm just to dense at the moment to see the relation.

I'm about halfway through The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-time. The comments I've gotten about this book have been mixed but so far I like it. I'm a little worried at how closely I relate to the main character who is supposed to be autistic. It has occured to me in the past that I might have some undiagnosed developmental disorder or whatever you call it and that this would explain why I can't seem to relate to 95% of humanity.

Sorry if this entry is pretty boring. My head hurts but I just wanted to get this stuff out. Hope all of you have a great rest of the weekend.

Reading The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-time
Wishing My headache would go away
Plotting to make dinner

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